Melissa and I decided to take Jackson and Addison (Grayson is with his dad this weekend) to the outlet malls in San Marcos. It was a beautiful Spring day and I was halfway looking for a new pair of shoes. So we set out after very carefully packing the diaper bag for a day away from the house and headed the 45 mins to the greatest outlet mall EVER.
Melissa drove us in her car which is a rarity. Normal we set out in our Endeavor because I have the carseat base and booster seat and stroller in the back and it has more room. But today Adam had taken the Endeavor to work so we decided to all pile into Melissa's VW Jetta. We had an extra booster seat for Jackson and the carseat carrier can be used without the base, and Melissa figured out how to get the giant stroller in her tiny trunk. So away we went.
We arrived around 3pm and walked all around the outlet. It was pretty crowded and pretty warm - up to 86 degrees and we were remarking here and there about how this was preparing us for our planned September trip to Disney World in Florida. Addie and Jack were both really, really good. Addison napped in her stroller as we walked in and out of store after store and Jack insisted on opening and holding all the doors open for us and the stroller.
Melissa found a great overnight bag on sale at Kate Spade and I found --what else-- more clothes for Addison! Great sales at Gymboree this time. No shoes for me though. I'll have to keep looking. Darn. ;)
Our last store stop was the Williams Sonoma - Pottery Barn Outlet. Jack was getting tired and hungry, as were we, and he was getting a little less happy to be shopping. He found a yellow spatula with a bunny rabbit on it as we were walking around Williams Sonoma and he wanted it. I looked quizzically at him, wondering what on Earth he could want with it. He informed me he wanted to pretend cook with it. And he does pretend play with Adam's cool cooking utensils all the time and then I have to re-wash them all because they've been laying on the couch for an afternoon. I thought Jack had a good idea and for $5 I said sure, you can have it. He was very happy with it and walked around the store with it, pretending to cook and serve me things as we finished up our shopping.
Well, as we wrapped back around to the front of the store and started to check out, Melissa nor I had gotten anything else and the line at the register was 10 people deep. I really didn't want to stand in line that long for a play spatula for Jackson. So I did what any good parent does in a situation like this and bribed him with ice cream. ;) ( Don't worry, I'll find an old spatula at home and designate it as his pretend play one)
We were hungry anyway and had been planning on heading to get dinner next anyway so it worked out well. We headed back to the car, loaded ourselves into the small car we aren't used to and I got on my iPhone to look up a place for dinner. We had eaten around that area several times and knew of a lot of places but none of them sounded appealing. I found a review on Yelp for a place right across the street that said they had great burgers and shakes. We had actually been in this little antique gas station looking place before because they sell Vera Bradley and I remembered thinking it smelled good in there and remarking to Melissa that I wondered what kind of restaurant it was.
We headed across the street and grabbed a booth in a corner and ordered burgers, onion rings and a vanilla shake for all three of us to share. Jack's kid meal came with an ice cream cone so SCORE on his bribe. We inhaled our food. Our hunger, having not eaten since breakfast, probably helped the food along a bit but it was all really good. Especially the onion rings! Addie had her first bites of a burger. I started out pinching off bites of meat from my burger and bread and she was gobbling them up so fast I started letting her take bites of the burger. Of course this was all closely supervised but she was really digging her first burger and did such a good job taking bites like a big girl! For a baby that only started really eating pureed baby foods a month ago, she is doing awesome in the eating department. Like I should have ever doubted that with Adam and I as parents! Addie even got upset at the hot french fry in her hand that I tried to keep away from her. You know you are a hydro parent, aware of every little potential developmental and neurological issue, when you are relieved when your child can feel that something is hot!
We took our time eating and tried our best to clean up the mess we made of that table. Addie finally reached her fill point and I had to make Jack eat two more bites of his burger to get his ice cream cone.
We headed to the store next door... another wonderful perk of this little hole in the wall and took our time looking around, taking turns holding Addie while the other shopped around. We had left the stroller in the car as small boutique like shops aren't as stroller friendly and quickly realized how heavy she is! Finally, an hour and forty five minutes later we were ready to get Jack's free ice cream cone and head home. I picked up a few pieces of fudge that I was nice enough to share, and Jack picked out cookies and cream based on the pictures on the front of the Blue Bell ice cream cooler. Melissa had already taken Addie to the car to get her clicked back into her car seat while I paid for the fudge and Jack got started on his cone.
We made it to the car and I remembered that there was a few hours old formula in the only bottle I had brought with us so I poured it out by walking to the grassy area beside the car and chunking the formula onto the grass. I rinsed out the bottle and decided to wait to make the bottle as we were on the way home. I didn't want to waste any on the off chance that she might fall asleep without a bottle.
No sooner had we pulled onto the interstate to head back to Austin, Addie started fussing. I figured she was tired and thirsty after all the food she had inhaled. I went to fix her bottle and realized that the blue ring that goes into the bottle that stops it from leaking (gotta love the Avent style bottle that needs an extra part to stop it from leaking) was no where to be found. I realized that it must have gone flying when I was throwing out the old formula. I tried, in vain, to see if it maybe wouldn't leak that badly -- yeah right. By this time, Addison is full on crying, no longer patiently fussing for her bottle. So Melissa suggests we pull off and find another bottle. A Walgreens was found fairly quickly. I run in and try to check out quickly but get stuck behind a lady trying to explain why her purchase price should have been two dollars less than it was. I finally check out. I had grabbed a Vent Air bottle that we are using for OT to help her hold her bottle. My hope was that she would at least recognize it and I didn't want to add yet another bottle system into the mix.
I get to the car and Addie is screaming. Jack very matter of factly is saying from the backseat "Addison not happy. Addison not happy." Melissa pulled over in the Walgreens parking lot so we can get everything set up to get back on the road. I am trying to put the bottle together. I had to unscrew the bottom vent air portion to get the paper out of it and I already have some formula made up in the Avent bottle that was missing the leak stop ring. I pour the formula from the old bottle into the new bottle and Melissa points out that the new bottle is also ... now... leaking. Somehow when I had screwed the vent air thingie back on the bottom, I had not done it correctly and we had formula leaking out of the bottom. I put the old bottle under the new bottle and am sitting there watching it slowly drip as Addison is crying in the back ground and Jack is continually announcing... "Addison not happy." in his sing song way.
I try to screw the vent air thingie on tighter and I just make the leak worse. I'm not wanting to sit there and wait for the formula to leak it's way into the old bottle again so I could fix the new bottle. So I think -- ok I can just quickly turn the new bottle over and pour the formula into the old bottle, then fix the new bottle and then we'd be good to go. This was a good idea. In theory. But somehow the execution did not go according to plan.
I wish I could re-watch what happened next in slow motion. Somehow I missed the old bottle and the formula that was in the new bottle went flying everywhere. Pour is not an accurate description of what I did with the formula. I was soaked. Melissa was soaked. Her car was white with formula dripping down the window, down the seat, onto the floorboard, on the dashboard, down between the middle console and passenger seat. If you can imagine a surface that is in a front seat of a car, it was now wet with formula. Melissa is cracking up laughing. Nearly crying, she is laughing so hard and I am doing my darnedest not to curse.
I literally said -- Mother Mother BAD WORD mother bad word bad word bad word.
Yes... I said "bad word" instead of any actual bad words. I try really hard not to curse and I try even harder to not curse in front of my kids. But let me tell you, saying the words "bad word".... well it loses a bit of the cathartic value of letting a string of curse words go when one is at the end of the exasperation rope, such as I was.
And about that time, amidst the screams from the backseat,
"Addison not happy."
"What was your first clue, Jackson?" was my Mom of the Year reply.
I guess the bright side was that now that the formula had been spilled all over the car and my lap, I was able to figure out what the heck was wrong with the stupid new vent air thingie bottle and get it all fixed. I handed 4 of the original 8 ounces I had made to Jack to give Addie and we were back on the road. Wet. But back on the road.
We made it a block down the road and Jackson opened the back door of the car.
We pulled back off the road and I went around to shut the back door. That's how we found out the hard way that her car doesn't have a child safety lock. Thankfully he was buckled in (always!) and thankfully we were not on the interstate, but we had to have a little talk about not pulling on door handles.
We are finally back onto the interstate and Addie had drowned her 4 ounces and was none to happy that there wasn't more to be had. So I got the bottle back from Jack and carefully made four more ounces.
After I had put the two scoops of powderd formula into the bottle, as I'm handing the bottle back to Jackson to give to his sister, I knock the ziploc bag off my lap and the powder formula has now joined into the rest of the liquid formula mess. It was now covering the contents of my purse , stuck to my wet jeans and all over Melissa's floorboard.
You cannot make this stuff up.
Jack gave Addie her bottle as I am sitting in the front seat marveling at my complete and utter slick-dom. In the course of 30 mins I had managed to lose an important piece of bottle equipment, not put together a new bottle properly, leak formula from said new bottle then pour said new bottle all over myself and the car, and then dump an entire baggie of powdered formula into my bag, my lap and onto the floor.
Slick, I tell ya.
Finally we had to pull over yet again. Addie was not happy with her next four ounces and Jack wasn't able to get her to take her paci. So I crawled into the back seat with Jack and Addie.
Addie immediately grabbed my iPhone and started chewing on it, happy as a clam, grinning at me.
"Addie happy now." Jack announces.
Melissa loses it laughing at this point and that's not exactly good driving technique on the interstate ifyaknowwhatImean! She held it together, barely!
Then Jack says...
"Mom....what did you say... Mother what??"
Ok then it was my turn to lose it laughing.
I told him I said "mother mushroom".
He thought that was the funniest thing ever. And somehow it turned from mother mushroom to muffy mushroom so now Jack's favorite 'bad word' is muffy mushroom!
Somehow we made it home in one piece. What took us 45 mins to get there took us an hour and half to get back.
And that little stinker Addison...
the sleepy miss drama queen, I want a bottle now diva?
She stayed awake the entire ride home.